Reading about the woodcutter, aka death, in the Tale of Two Cities has me thinking about what I am doing in life. As we all know, life for everyone and anything ends at one point, whether you are a fruit fly or a massive star. If you knew that you would die within the next month or so wouldn’t you want to do everything in life you find fun and meaningful to you? Most people would probably say yes, no one wants to spend the last month of their life working a dead-end job or studying.
I have been spending most of my life trying to live up to what my parents want me to be. Since I have the stereotypical Asian parents this means getting nothing under than an A in all classes, graduating from a prestigious college, and becoming a doctor, lawyer, or engineer. To keep up with such standards, I have to focus almost all my energy into school which means I only sometimes go out with friends and don’t do things I want to do as often as I want to. Going the accepted methods of spending time such as going to sports games, concerts, going out with friends often, etc. I really enjoy just staying at home browsing Reddit or playing games such as Star Wars: The Old Republic or League of Legends. If I were to die within a month or so I would probably play Star Wars and League of Legends with my friends most of the time and the rest of the time traveling the world to look at various wonders of nature. I know most people would frown upon the double digit amount of hours I spend on the computer, but its what I find enjoyable. I find the thrill of being a Sith Lord or a Clone trooper along with my friends in the Star Wars universe more than the experience of going with my friends to a concert or going to a sports game. Sometimes I really question the amount of time I spend online and think about my social skills and how they are lacking sometimes, sometimes I question how I am investing so much time into school to live up to my parent’s expectations, while other times I ask myself “What if I become a basement dwelling social introvert”. I wish at times that my interests weren’t so introverted and that I was a more social person.